Know Your Limits

The second of the interval days was almost more painful than the first. This time it was my body that was hurting, instead of my ego. I managed to get the first two 400's in under the 82 seconds, and after the second one, I was fairly certain that I was done for the day.

I was doubled over in agony while my children sat in the shade of the building near the track. Kiana, my two-year old, asked, "Mom, what are you doing?"

I managed to get in, "I'm dying," between breaths.

Haley, my almost-six-year-old, aptly responded, "You know, you don't have to do this mom."

She was right, but I was too out of breath to finish the conversation with her, so instead I just nodded in agreement. I did one more 400 at my hardest pace and then jogged out the last two laps.

There is no reason that I should be doing this to myself, except that I just want to see what this old body can still do.

It has been an exercise in acceptance. As of right now, I am definitely improving with each time out to the track, but I highly doubt that I will come very close to what I could do as a college athlete. I've had to let go of the frustration that I often feel when I attempt to do something that used to come so easily for me. That is not where I am right now, and it is not what I can do.

There is a reason that the most competitive an average person can become happens around the college years. That is not to say that every athlete has the window close when they reach 22, but for most people, the limits start to close in. It is an exceptional athelete who can break swimming records at the age of 40, or play professional baseball well into the 50's. I'm not exceptional, and I am not breaking any records that matter.

I did, however, manage to get in 5 400's today for the first time this summer. I was able to get in two of them faster than 82 seconds and I ran the fifth one only one second slower than the one before. That is a good day for me. It is not what I could have done twelve years ago, but I am not who I was twelve years ago.

Some days will be better than others, and on those bad days I hope that I can just chalk it up as a bad day and start to get ready for the next one. My best is not good enough to compete with trained college athletes, but my goal has been to find my personal limit, and that is the best I can do.